Category Archives: Humor

Oregon de facto opens vaccine eligibility to everyone

This is the correct step regardless:

As it has done so far, the state will continue to allow Oregonians to self attest to their eligibility for vaccinations — meaning a doctor’s note or proof of age or occupation aren’t required. Public health officials say requiring proof of eligibility could slow down the vaccinations rollout.

Source: Oregonians age 45 and older with underlying conditions can get COVID vaccine March 29 — general population by July 1 – oregonlive.com

See the earlier post about being unable to verify eligibility.

As said here in the past, by April or so, vaccinations need to be open to all as there is no way to verify eligibility.

Otherwise, we get the absurdity of The Onion’s column on vaccine rollouts:

“If you are between the ages of 49 and 52, were born in Iowa but now live in Ohio, reside exactly 3.25 miles from a hospital, or have bowled a 300 game, you should proceed to a medical facility to receive your Covid vaccine,”

Much more at the link – hilarious as usual!

Heh: Nation Enters New Phase Of Vaccine Distribution Where Capricorns, Gymnasts, Childless Uncles Now Eligible For Inoculation

“If you are between the ages of 49 and 52, were born in Iowa but now live in Ohio, reside exactly 3.25 miles from a hospital, or have bowled a 300 game, you should proceed to a medical facility to receive your Covid vaccine,”

The Onion: Nation Enters New Phase Of Vaccine Distribution Where Capricorns, Gymnasts, Childless Uncles Now Eligible For Inoculation

Stunning: Cause of Covid-19 pandemic waves revealed

The cause been right out there all this time.

Obviously, the pandemic waves correlate with solar sunspots!

We don’t know if the sunspots caused the pandemic waves or if the pandemic waves caused the sunspots, but does it matter?

Note the case peaks in spring, July, and then climbing in October-December, peaking, and then falling off a cliff.

Now take a look at the solar sunspot index from Feb last year to this year.

The blue line – solar sunspot number – peaks in April, then in July, and then in October starts climbing with a peak in December, followed by a sharp drop off.

The correlation is obvious, isn’t it?

Do you think I should submit this to Nature?

Seriously, it makes about as much sense as the other ten random official explanations by experts as to why the pandemic peaked and is now collapsing!

They have no idea why nor do I. But they can spin some fancy dancing and hand waving with equally nonsensical explanations!

I have seen many erroneous random correlations made by “experts” recently. Hopefully this sort of example makes clear the silliness of what they are doing. Sadly, people take the “experts” seriously.

Awkward: “Data shows COVID-19 infection rates are in free-fall around the world”

Epidemiologists in panic as good news surges in an exponential growth pattern:

In what has become an unmistakable trend globally, the COVID-19 pandemic appears to be loosening its grip around the world. In the U.S. alone, cases are down 30% from last week.

Source: Data shows COVID-19 infection rates are in free-fall around the world | Disrn

Experts, quoted at the end, say we must continue to lock up, socially isolate, cover our faces – forever – and we must continue to follow the mitigation strategies that resulted in a 10x increase in cases in late 2021. Really.

In the UK they say two people, both vaccinated, should not meet together. Epidemiologists say you should continue to suffer in social isolation as long as we can force you to.

The epidemiologists Strike Back: Revenge of the Models Episode III

Fearful of the damage that may occur from the continued surge in good news, epidemiologists are striking back.

WE HAVE MODELS.

Late last week, the Institute for Health Metrics and Evaluation (IHME) shared its updated COVID projections that run through the end of April. The IHME, a research center at the University of Washington, makes predictions at the global, national and state levels.

Here’s what the two organizations [Fred Hutch being the other one] forecast:

Using numbers most closely matching the current vaccination rate in King County, the Fred Hutch model predicts a fourth wave of cases — caused mostly by the UK variant, known as B.1.1.7 — to hit between May and August, triggering the need for a partial lockdown.

If the region is able to reach vaccination numbers closer to 45,000 a week (or 45,000 a day statewide), the fourth wave could possibly be eliminated, or delayed until fall and greatly reduced, depending on multiple factors.

IHME predicts that infection and death rates will continue declining for Washington and U.S. at least through the spring — unless we experience a worst-case scenario in which the variants begin spreading wildly, including among people who are vaccinated.

https://www.msn.com/en-us/health/medical/new-covid-19-prediction-models-forecast-a-potential-fourth-wave-and-how-to-minimize-it/ar-BB1dmwqe?ocid=BingNews

Conclusion: Lock downs and face masks forever!!!!!!

When it comes to a spring COVID surge, “I don’t think any state will allow this to happen,” said Ali Mokdad, an IHME professor and chief strategy officer for Population Health at the UW.

Of course, nearly every state already allowed this to happen last year in spite of, not because, of their restrictions.

Many of us have been locked up, locked down, socially isolated, wearing face masks since last spring. None of that worked to stop the peak waves in fall or winter.

So let’s do it all over again – because it worked so well last time!

The epidemiologists are determined to put an end to the surge in good news – and riding to their salvation are models (never mind they’ve been wrong, and sometimes massively wrong, for the past year).

Will want to follow up on these predictions over the coming months.

Related: The suicide of expertise